Chapter Nineteen - Day Three 8:00 AM

I heard the tires of the Bentley screeching as I as I was putting on my shoes. I grabbed my brown leather jacket and was out the door just as The King of Kings did another power slide and came to a stop at my curb.

I was shaking my head as I was getting in the Continental R coupe. "You certainly are one for dramatic entrances, Lord."

"I don't get to drive much, Theodore. When I do, I like to make the most out of it." Jesus was grinning.

"Where we off to this morning?" I quiried HE.

"The Blessed Sacrament Cathedral on Woodward." The Lord explained. "There is a confession coming in that I need to be there for."

You know, Jesus, I was raised Byzantine Catholic, and did the whole confession thing. The priest seemed bored with my sins, more often than not. But, I think it had a real, healing value.

"People have a burning need to tell their sins to someone. The Catholic Church provided that," explained HE. "There is a cathartic effect. But like everything else that carries power with it, it got corrupted by many. My favorite was buying certificates of absolution. That was the first paper money."

The LORD continued, "However, many of the confessions coming in regarding ending the great evil, have been confessions driven by fear, not by remorse or repentence. I suspect that is what is driving this "spiritual awaking" we are seeing."

We were blowing down I75 in the Bentley at 117 miles per hour, and the Son of Man was weaving in and out of traffic with the grace of a eagle in flight. I held on as we hit Exit 56B and the ramp onto Michigan Route 8 West. The tires we smoking, and I could smell rubber burning. "This is great!" I thought to myself.

We got off M8 at Oakland Ave/Woodward Ave and took a hard left onto M1 Woodward South. The Catherdral was just ahead on the left.

Jesus launched the Bentley into the parking lot next to Blessed Sacrement and we came to a rest.

"Hoo-wee Teddy-boy! That 'twas fun." Jesus said as he jumped out of the car. "Let's go."

We entered the Church from a back side entrance. There was a line of people qued up to confess. Business was good. Jesus sliped into a vacant confessional and began taking confessions. I sat in a pew near the confessional. The people there were the normal fair. Mostly old people who probably hadn't done anything wrong in ten years or more. Real sinners didn't have the courage to confess.

My cell phone vibrated in my pocket. I pulled it out, it was the I AM. "Jesus?" I asked as I answered the phone.

"Ted." The Lord whispered. "I thought you should hear this. For the historical record, you know."

I looked up, just as both confessionals opened up. A well-dressed man eye's darted nervously between them, and then he walked into the confessor's side of the one where Jesus had taken up residence.

I put the cell phone to my ear. "Forgive me Father for I have sinned...." "My last confession was over thirty years ago...."

The man went through the usual sins. Then he got to the point. "Father. I have been involved with child pornography for many years."

Then Jesus said, "What do you mean by involved? Please explain."

"Well. I, umm, have used it." the man stammered.

There was silence for what seemed like an eternity. I sensed Jesus was giving the man a chance to say more.

"That's it? You have used it?" I heard anger in The Lord's voice.

"That's all I have ever done. I swear Father." that was all the man was going to say.

"Well, my son, that is just not good enough!" Jesus shot back. "Isn't it true that you are a major player in the child pornography business? Isn't it true that you have engaged in sex with young children? Isn't it true that you have made trips to Bangkok, Thialand for the purpose of getting children for the sex-slave trade? Isn't it true you have murdered children after you have raped them?"

The man in the confessional began to ask, "Who are you? How..." as he tried to get out of there. I could see the handle shaking from where I was sitting.

"If you came here to confess your sins, then confess your sins!" the Lord bellowed.

"Who are you?!" the man screamed as he was furiously shoving against the door trying to escape his fate.

"Confess your sins Sir. Confess!" the Lord commanded. "This is pointless..."

A loud crash came out of the confessional as the man let out a terrifying scream. The few people in the cathedral ran towards the confessional door, just as it opened and the man fell out onto the floor, his eyes two smoking, bleeding holes in his skull, and an omega symbol burned into his forehead.

I peered into the confessional to see the screen smashed through from Jesus' side. The door to it opened, and Jesus stepped out wiping his fingers with a small handkerchief.

"Time to go, Theo" and the Lord and I walked down the main aisle, and exited the Blessed Sacrament Cathedral, like MacManus brothers from The Boondock Saints. The Lord tossed me a pair of Ray Bans as we jumped into the Bentley and headed north.

copyright 2010 Ted Sky all rights reserved

Chapter Eighteen - Day Three 2:17 AM

I was having a dream, another vivid dream. The Son of Man and I were walking on a remote beach. The water was shimmering. There was not a sound in the air, save for the surf. I turned around to check. Just as I thought, there were two sets of footprints. I let out a "Ha!"

"What was that for, Theodore?" askith The Lord.

"Oh. Nothing. Just an inside joke with myself." was all I had the balls to admit.

The Lord turned to me, put his left hand on my right shoulder, took his right hand and rapped the top of my head with his knuckles.

"Hey, hey! What is THAT for?" I asked, as I rubbed the top of my skull.

"Family Guy, Ted? You watched a Family Guy Marathon?!??!" The Lord was expressing his dissatisfaction with my TV viewing choice from the evening. "You know, they aren't excatly kind to Christians on that show!"

"Come on now Jesus! It's just edgey humor, that's all." I defended.

"Hey, I don't mind me, but they like to make fun of my mom and dad too," Jesus was genuinely hurt.

"Okay. You're right Jesus. Poor choice on my part. My apologies to your mom and dad too."

"Apology accepted," Jesus said. "I will pick you up at 8:00 AM. I have to make a few stops in the morning, then we are going to go live later in the day."

"Live?" I asked.

Then I woke up from my sleep.

The clock flashed 2:17 AM.

There was a lump on my head.

I let out a groan and went back to sleep.

copyright 2010 Ted Sky all rights reserved

Chapter Seventeen - Day Two 7:00 PM

I made it home just in time to catch the major network newscasts. On CNN they were reporting on the video of Jesus' cover of "The Man Comes Around" that someone had uploaded to YouTube that morning. There were over two million viewings so far. Dorf Pister stated that the man in the video could be Osama bin Laden. I laughed out loud, a real LOL. "Man," I thought to myself, "they trot that guy out anytime they want to place blame." Bin Laden was either dead in an Afganistan cave, or in a CIA safe house.

The TSA terror alert level had been raised to Red.

At least someone at CNN had the intellectual capacity to connect the reapperance of the Son of Man with the mass blindings going on around the world. What they didn't know was why.

Dorf cut to a General Havnotaclu from the Pentagon, "It is obvious that this man, whoever he is, is part of a much larger terrorist network that is carrying out attacks across the world. Something this large and complex took years to plan and required heavy financing."

Dorf asked, "Has there been any progress on finding out why this attack is so selective?"

The General replied, "We are looking for DNA markers from all the victims. A bioweapon that mames like this, must have some type of DNA selectivity."

Dorf's eyes lit up. "So, we have a biological or chemical trace of the bioweapon?"

"Actually, no. Whatever this is appears to cleanse itself out of the body after it has done it's damage," the General answered.

"Then how do you know it is a bioweapon?" Dorf asked.

"What else could it be?" huffed General Havnotaclu.

"Of course.... we'll be back, right after this" and CNN cut to a commercial.

"Of course, it couldn't be an act of God, or an act of The Son of God, now could it?", I Snorted.

I changed the channel to a Family Guy marathon on Comedy Central I needed something lighter to quiet my mind.

Tonight's sleep was going to be fretful.

Again.

copyright 2009 Ted Sky all rights reserved

Chapter Sixteen - Day Two 2:22 PM

There wasn't much work going on at work. People were mostly standing around talking, sharing stories of what they had heard about friends of friends, or their own family members. It was hard for me to believe I had a role in the maddness sweeping the world.

I went into back into my office and shut the door. I wasn't getting much work done either, but decided looking like I was working was probably best. I started browsing the internet. There was not much new on the major news outlets. They were clueless or told not to cover what was really going on. It was hard to tell. I clicked over to my favorite open source intelligence sites. On one, there was a link to an audio file from a patriot radio show that was broadcast earlier in the day. The link read, "Could this be it?"

I clicked on it.

RealPlayer launched, and the I listened as a caller into The Alex Jones show started to talk. "Alex, I only can talk for a minute. I work in an area of the goverment that monitors voice and electronic traffic from some very disturbing parts of society. I can only tell you that what we were hearing was bizzare. Yesterday, shortly after 5:30am, we started getting hits from all over the world. People in child pornography rings were contacting eachother to findout who was waking up blind. As they day wore on these people were becoming more and more frantic. We started to see internet servers in Demark, The Netherlands, Thailand, France, and other countries know as safe harbors for child pornography being pulled off line or wiped clean. I don't know if there is a real connection here or not, but these criminals think there is."

I sat back in my chair, and thought to myself, "So, that's it. The great evil Jesus spoke about, and told the world he was going to end."

I had no doubts.

I couldn't think of a greater evil to end.

copyright 2009 Ted Sky all rights reserved

Chapter Fifteen - Day Two 7:15 AM

The Pale Rider was still at it.

I knew that when I woke to the shreek of sirens. "Jesus...," I mumbled as I made my way to the shower. I just stood there for awhile, letting the shower massage sting my body awake. "Man, I hate waking up....." Sleep can be so peaceful. If death is nothing but a big sleep, I would be okay with that. But it sure didn't seem like that was the way the system worked, if my friend The Son of Man had anything to do with it. I finally got up enough enthusiasm to wash the film of skin flecks off my body. I have to shower every morning, or I can't function.

I was shaving in the mirror when I heard something. The bathroom fan was whirring. I flicked the switch to "off." Yeah, there was something going on downstairs. i quickly finished up, pulled on a pair of jeans and gingerly made my way down. There was The Lord, lightly playing an acoustic guitar, and humming. He looked up, and said, "Good morning Theodore!"

"Mornin Jesus..." I replied. "What's up?"

"I thought we'd make another video this morning. Are you up for that?"

"Well, I am up, and I don't see any point in saying no." I was not overly enthusiastic.

"Good. There is a camera and tripod in that duffle bag, and some lights. It's all about the lighting, you know. The lighting sets the mood." Apparently, Jesus took film in college, or was at least in the AV club. "You set everything up, and I will make breakfast."

Jesus was whistling, cracking eggs, and cooking up something that smelled very good.

"Hey Jesus, where do you want me to shoot you at?" I querried.

"Put me in the corner, make sure you leave room for the guitar. This is going to be a music video." The Lord instructed.

I set everything up, turning my family room into a small sound stage. I actually liked the whole film thing.

Jesus yelled, "Breakfast is ready!" just as I was finishing putting filters on the lights.

"It smells great!" I said as I sat down.

"Dig in Tedushu!" sayith the One.

I was gobbling up my scrambled eggs, when I notice the pile of eggs shells on the sink countertop. They were small. Very small. "Ummmmm.....Jesus. What, exactly, am I eating here?" I was now curious what I had gulped down so quickly.

"Dove eggs, scrammbled with lamb and goat cheese." the Lord explained.

"Oh!" I said. "It did taste familiar..."

Jesus and I both burst out laughing.

"I figured with all those trips to China, something a little different was in order." The Lord was still laughing.

"Yeah, I ate some weird food there." I was still laughing too.

We finished up our breakfast. Jesus was rinsing plates, and I was loading them in the dishwasher.

The Son of Man put his hands on his hips and said, "There. Now we can get to our video."

"Alrighty, Lord. Let's get crackin. I should go into work today." I really did need to go into the office.

Jesus took his place on the chair in the corner. Now he was dressed in torn up jeans, and a black T-shirt that read, "CASH."

I rigged the mic as a boom, and set the lighting. The sun had moved during our breakfast.

"Okay," I said as I put on the headphones. "Sound check."

Jesus said, "Testing 1....2....3..Test.....Test.."

I set the sound levels, and then moved to the camera. The lighting looked good. The Lord looked good. It was like an MTV Unplugged video. Then I saw something, and popped from behind the camera. "Hey, umm, Jesus. You have some egg in your teeth."

"Oops. Sorry. How undignified of me." as he worked his pinky nail through his teeth. "How's that."

I checked the view finder, and zoomed in as Jesus smiled widely. "Looks good. Ready?"

"Yep. Let's go." The Lord replied.

I said, "Sound........Speed.....J.C. Music Video Take one....Action!"

The Son of Man looked into the camera and said, "Behold a pale horse," began to play the guitar and sing.

"There's a man goin' 'round takin' names
An he's deicidin who to free and who to blame
Everybody won't be treated all the same.."

The King of Kings was signing "When The Man Comes Around," by Johnny Cash

My foot was tapping along.

When he got to, "Whoever is unjust, let he be unjust still." Jesus looked right into the camera, his eyes a burning coal black.

"Whoever is rightous, let him be rightous still.
Whoever is filthy, let him be filthy still.
Listen to the words long written down,
When the man comes around."

I had chills running down my spine. This was going to freak people out, and we were going to get it in one take.

"It's alpha and omega kingdon come."

The Lord finished with,
"In measured hundredweight and penny pound,
When the man comes around."

Then he said, "You can look up the rest" and gently put the guitar down.

I waited a few seconds and said, "Cut. That was perfect, Jesus."

Jesus smiled, got up and moved to the couch. "Ted, I want you to splice in a few frames where I sign, 'Let whoever is filthy, let him be filthy still' with this." He took the remote control for the TV and pressed 'On." The TV was on CNN with the image of the Reverend Joel Graham. His eyes were gone, burned out like so many others. On his forehead was a burn, like a brand. It was the Alpha. Jesus smiled a crooked grin.

Jesus started packing up his video gear.

I askith HE, "Hey Jesus, are you actually enjoying this?"

HE replied, "Enjoy? Let's just say I have wanted to do this for a long time."

"Okay......but, just what are you, we, doing?" I askith.

"You are smart guy, I am betting it will be revealed to you soon." replied HE.

On the TV in the background, the reporter was saying that people were waking up blind again today. The world was now in a full-blown panic. The terror alert had been raised to Red.

Jesus was heading out the door, with his gear, and said, "Get that on YouTube as soon as you can."

I told Jesus, "You can leave that stuff here."

The Lord replied, "Better not. All digital cameras and videos cameras encode a serial number. You don't want to be found with the video gear from a terrorist."

"Good point. Thanks Jesus."

"Thank you Ted. This is a good thing we are doing." and he was out the door.

I wasn't exactly sure what we were doing, but the project manager did. That was enough for me.

After editing the video, I loaded it up to YouTube, using some IP jumping software. Not that I thought it would hide were it came from for too long.

Just long enough.


copyright 2009 Ted Sky all rights reserved

Chapter Fourteen - Day One 7:00 PM

The afternoon at work was filled with chatter about what was going on in the world. One person had to run home. Their grandfather had woken up blind, and was stuck in his cabin in the UP.

No one knew what was happening, and they were scared. I told a few people that it was probably a reaction to the H1N1 vaccines, just to mess with their heads. People will let someone with a white coat stick a needle in there arm, because the man on TV said so. Sheep.

By the time five o'clock rolled around the building was nearly empty. It was time to go home and see what the network news had to say. By 7:00 PM, the sun had shown it's light to most of the world. And the deed would be done.

I got home and tuned into Fox News, then flipped to CNN, NBC, CBS, ABC, PBS, and BBC. Speculation was rampant. They seemed to be settling on a bio weapon invisible cloud of some sort. Of course, Al Queda was suspected. How a bunch of guys in caves in a faraway land would have pulled it off, wasn't explained. They didn't have to. Just throw out the boogieman, Al Queda, and everyone nodded. The fools. They didn't even know that we, well, the CIA started Al Queda back during the Afghan-Soviet war. Osama Bin Laden was a CIA asset. Hell, even the name Al Queda was created by us.

I did have to agree that this event had all the ear marks of a terror attack. Then I laughed out loud, Jesus Christ - TERRORIST. Who would ever believe that?

copyright 2009 Ted Sky all rights reserved

Chapter Thirteen - Day One 12:00 noon

I took my lunch break, and after getting a chicken salad sandwich from the company cafe', check news web site to see what was going on in the world, and if Jesus' promise to "end a great evil" had begun.

freep.com had a story about the people blinded by the chemical explosion, but it seemed the cloud did not dissipate. There were now 153 reported blindings, many from outside the containment area. Was that the work of The Lord?

I jumped over to cnn.com. All across America people were waking up blind. I decided to run home and see if their were any reports on network news.

Running out of the office, I told Mandy, my administrative assistant I would be back in an hour. My home was only a few miles from work.

As soon as I walked out the door, I heard police and ambulance sirens coming from every direction. "What the hell is going on?" I thought to myself, as ran to my SUV. As soon as I got in, and started the engine, I flipped on the radio to the local news channel, it was a special news segment on the cases of people waking up blind. "This is bad...." I said out loud.

The traffic on Brown Road was heavy, mostly due to the constant pulling over to make way for an ambulance racing past. I decided to take a short cut down Josyln and over to Flint Ridge to get to Maybee Road, which was the main road to my subdivision. It still took me twenty-five minutes for a two mile drive. Walking would have been faster.

When I pulled in my driveway, I hit the garage door opener button, parked my car and ran under the opening garage door. Walking into my kitchen, I saw my flat screen TV was already on, and a voice said, "That took you long enough." It was, The Son of Man.

"Jesus! I'm glad to see your okay. Is this your doing?" as I pointed to the TV.

"Ted, just have a seat." The Lord replied.

I sat down on the couch next to The Lord to watch the CNN Special Report. Reports of people waking up blind were coming in from all over the world. Not just blind, their eyes were gone, burned out during the night. There were warnings to remove children from the room before they showed the photos and videos of people swarming hospitals, screaming “It hurts! It hurts!” holding their faces, with black holes where they eyes used to be. Some of the holes in their heads were still smoking. "My God..." I said out loud.

"Present!" Jesus shouted. "Do you think this is Old Testament enough? Will anyone connect what I said last night with today's events?" The Lord said with a sarcatic smirk on his face.

"What is this all about?" I asked HE. "How are these people connecte?"

The Lord Explained, "The people that this is happening to don't even know what connects them. Some might suspect what their sin is, but they aren't sure. All will know in time, Theodore. I think by the end of Day Three........well, let's hope so."

I sat there watching the horror unfold across the world. I was racking my brain trying to understand this. All of these people, from all parts of the world, had something in common. Dorf Pitster was doing his best to seem intelligent, in what was quickly becoming a world-wide crisis. I looked at my watch and realized that whatever this was, it wasn't over yet. This day started at sunrise in Detroit, Michigan. It was moving West as the sun moved across the sky. Parts of the world were still under the cover of night. And it was only Day One.

Back to work.

copyright 2009 Ted Sky all rights reserved

Chapter Twelve - Day One 6:30 AM

I woke up, brushed my teeth, and looking at my aging face in the mirror. Time is cruel to us, I thought. I went down to the kitchen and got out the plastic red bowl I have used for my cereal for over thirty years. I laughed to myself, thinking how odd it was that I HAD to use this bowl to eat from. It was from margarine. My mom got it long ago, and I had taken it with me when I left home at eighteen. It is the perfect depth, and has the right pitch for my organic cereal and rice milk. I thought to myself that I should ask Jesus about the whole food allergy epidemic. "Jesus..." Was that that some wacked out dream last night? No, it had happened. Our biggest and scariest adventure yet. Up till now, my friendship with the Son Of Man was pretty much my secret. Now, a lot of people were going to know that Jesus has returned, and boy is he pissed! I got out my notebook to check how many hits the YouTube video of his sermon from the ballpark had since I uploaded it. Holy.......... 1,265,153. Over one million hits since late last night? This was going viral. It hit the refresh button. 1, 275,242. Ten thousand more views? I hit it again. It jumped to 1,313,313. There were tens of thousand of comments. Some uber-believers, and a lot of skeptics.

I looked for the remote, and turned on the TV. It was the normal AM broadcast, traffic, sports, local politics, and one story about a few people near a chemical plant who woke up blind. A leak of hydrogen chloride mixing with some other chemical was suspected. The feature story was about the mad man who took the stage last night at Comerica Park - Jesus Christ. They weren't admitting that, but I knew. I knew.

Finishing my cereal, I said I silent prayer. "The Lord is my sheperd..."

Off to work.

copyright 2009 Ted Sky all rights reserved

Chapter Eleven - The Return of The Pale Rider

My cell phone rang. The display read, “I Am.”

“Original” I thought to myself.

I hit the green answer button and said, “Hello Geeeeezuzzz!”

“Ted, my man! The circus is in town and we’re going. I will pick you up in fifteen.”

I snapped my cell phone shut, then went outside and sat down on my stoop, waiting for my latest adventure with The Son of Man to begin. At least today he was driving for change.

The sound of squealing tires punched through my suburban subdivision like a Japanese Zero on steroids making a low level bombing run. Around the corner appeared a pale grey Bentley Continental GT coupé, with Jesus grinning like a mad man behind the wheel. The Lord must have been doing 90 mph when he slid sideways, then backed into my driveway with the tires smoking. The passenger window came down, and The Lord commanded, “Get in Theodore.”

I got in the Bentley and closed the door to the sound of a $300,000 quality “thud.” “Where did you get THIS car?” I asked the King of Kings.

“At the Bentley dealer, duh! I have connections.”

We pulled out of the Rolling Meadows housing development and Jesus was headed to I 75 South. "Are we going for a tour of blighted America? Is that the 'circus?'" I asked.

"More or less." replied The Lord.

As we drove, all the construction was cleared and we passed right through.

"I will have to ride with you more often." I joked with HE.

We got off the freeway and made our way to Comerica Park. The Jumbo Sign read that Reverend Joel Graham was there today, with his “God Loves You Just the Way You Are” tour. The Lord let out a chuckle and said, “How do people keep falling for this crap?” while shaking his head.

This, of course, is the circus Jesus was referring to.

The Lord walked right through “Security” with a fake press pass with me tagging behind him like a new puppy. He marched right up to the base of the stage, turned and reached in his back pack and said, “Videotape this so we can upload it onto YouTube later.”

“Man, we are going to be in trou-ble” I thought to myself. (I wouldn’t miss it for anything on Earth, or in heaven.)

Jesus looked out over the 100,000 who gathered to hear the TV preacher, and said, “What is wrong with you people? You all go around mindless yapping about how ‘God is love.’ and ‘You are not perfect, just forgiven.’ Blah, blah, blah. Let me tell you something God is not just love, God is also vengeance! And right now, vengeance is on his mind.

There is not one of you who think for themselves. Everything you think you know has been created and fed to you by propagandists and politicians. You fall into the same game over and over again. Left versus right. Man versus woman. Black versus white. This is called the Hegelian Dialectic. It has been written about for 150 years, but you don’t know that because you don’t actually read anything. If it isn’t reported on the nightly news, it isn’t real to you. It was written that in the twenty first century you would not be able to think for yourselves. It has come to pass.

You are being lied to on such a grand scale you cannot imagine any other world than the one that has been created for you. If you are told something or someone is good or bad, you believe it. You are told to fear the people of the desert, so you do. You send you sons and daughters off to slaughter innocent people in far away lands, and they return to you broken and slaughtered. You hold onto your flag like the Holy Grail and weep for your children. Weep for all children of all people. Do you really think the Father cares what country you were born in? Do you know how many countries have appeared and vanished since the beginning? The Father did not give you a mind that was designed to think, only to have you use it as a receiver and re-transmitter of falsehoods. Here is a simple tool you can use, if ‘everyone’ thinks something is true, it isn’t. If you are told the truth by someone on TV, you haven’t been. Liars will always be liars.”

Someone shouted out, “Which is the right path? Who do we follow?

“Do not follow the herd of the red flag, or the herd of the blue flag. The only path to follow is your path alone. I have been called The Sheppard, because you are sheep, but you do not follow me. You follow others who say they know me. They do not. You follow anyone who tells you what you want to hear. What you want to hear is that there is no right and wrong. You want to hear that it is all relative. You want to hear that no matter what you do, you will gain the kingdom. As surely as there is day and night, there are good and evil. Satan is alive and well in many. Just as those who create goodness, know. Those who create evil know. It is not the sins of what you have done, or what you have thought that will damn you to hell. It is the sin of what you didn't do! It is the sin of doing nothing, DOING NOTHING is what you are all guilty of. You walk by the poor, you cross the street to avoid the crippled; you avert your eyes pretending to not see a beggar. You are supposed to be the vessels of God here on Earth. Instead, you are nothing but self-centered egotists. Every day, you spend your money on things you don’t need, for happiness you cannot achieve, all the while denying that it is up to you to change the world.

It has always been up to you!

You sit and kneel and pray waiting for me to come back and make your world all better. What you failed to realize, is that if Jesus was coming back, it wasn’t to reward the righteous. The righteous will be rewarded after this life. I suggest you go back and read The Old Testament, read of The Father’s anger and wrath to find why I am here.

Most of you will leave here today, go back to your lives and forget what I have told you. You will convince yourselves that it was just a mad man who took the stage today. The Father can no longer wait for you to act. That is why we are here. Before the sun rises, the end of one great evil begins. We are going to go Old Testament on this Earth.”

The crowd looked at each other, and wondered what great evil Jesus was referring to

Someone shouted, “What? What will you end?”

The Lord said, “Three days from when the sun next rises you will know.”

“Go now, and tell all you know that Judgment Night is at hand.”

The crowd, now stunned, was frozen. They were looking for the Reverend Joel Graham to retake the stage. The Reverend was seen coughing and rubbing his eyes, as he was whisked to his waiting limo. The great mass of people slowly dispersed, some believing that had seen the Son of Man, others were shaking their heads in disbelief.

The sound of police sirens racing to Comerica Park pierced through the air.

Jesus, left the stage and morphed into a disfigured man, to better clear the crowd. He was chuckling. “That should make the evening news! Eh, Ted?” he said to me.

“It’s going to make something….” I was officially freaked out.

The Lord let me drive the Bentley over to Culver’s for a burger and milkshake. After which, he dropped me off at home. “Remember to upload that onto YouTube tonight!” The Lord instructed me, and put the video camera into my hand.

“Hey! I don’t remembering signing up to be an apostle or whatever I am supposed to be now.” I said to The One.

“Ted, you signed up the first time your soul was angered over the inhumanity of humanity.” Jesus said.

With that, Jesus dropped the Bentley into gear and went screaming into the night.

copyright 2009 Ted Sky all rights reserved

Chapter Ten - The Geometry of Life

Saturday morning.

Sitting in my living room staring out over “the pond” The Pond doesn’t have a name. In Michigan, there are so many ponds and lakes they have given up naming them. Some have numbers as names. Others, like the one I am looking at, have no name or number.

It was snowing outside and I was watching its slow build up onto the frozen crust of the no-name pond, reflecting over the week’s events. Another week gone and I can’t even remember what the things were that kept my mind in its normally anxious state, other than the pervasive malaise affecting nearly everyone, “Will I continue to have a job…?” You can only worry about something so much and then you get numb to it. I was getting numb.

I started to get antsy and decided to drive down to the local Starbucks and get a cup of coffee.

The “Going Out of Business Sale!” sign people were out again. This time it was the Lay-Z-Boy store going out of business. I always thought a Lay-Z-Boy store was a stupid idea to begin with. “Another genius plan from a Wall Street MBA,” I thought to myself. At least there was work in holding signs. Pretty soon we all are going to be holding signs, just staring at each other and wondering what happened to The Great Republic. I passed one, two, then saw the third man standing in the freezing cold, this one had a big goofy smile on his face. I slowed and pulled over to where he was standing, hit the down button for the passenger window and said, “Get in Jesus.”

“Ted!” sayith The Lord as he got into my truck, tossing the “Going Out of Business!” sign in the back. “It took you long enough to get here. It’s bone cold out there.”

“Where you headed, Ted?” The Lord queried.

“I was making a run to Starbucks. I just felt like going for a drive” I replied.

“Great!” said Jesus, “I really like their White Chocolate Peppermint Mocha.” The Lord has complex tastes.

We rolled into the Starbucks, Jesus and I got out of my truck and walked in to get our beverages. The line was almost to the door. People still had enough money to spring for a little bit of liquid luxury.

As we stood in line, Jesus smiled at everyone as they made their way out, and said, “Have a blessed day.” Some just smiled, others said, “You too!” The rest looked at him like he was some kind of a kook. It wasn’t much different than the reactions I get when I am out and about. When we got to the front of the line, Jesus order a Vente White Chocolate Peppermint Mocha, pointed to me and said, “He’s buying.”

“Of course,” I sighed, and ordered my Grande decaf, with room for cream. I decided to get two chocolate croissants too. I figured me and The Lord could use some pick-me-up pastry.

We got back in my truck, and I started to drive to nowhere in particular. I took a deep breath and let out a sigh. “What’s bugging you, Teddy Boy?” the King of Kings inquired.

“Well, my friend, I am feeling weary. I have been reading and studying on how the world really works and where we are headed for a number of years now, when I talk about it, most people think I am some kind of ‘conspiracy theorist.’ What’s wrong with being a ‘conspiracy theorist’ anyway? ‘Conspire’ means two or more people worked together to pull off a crime, or hoax. It seems pretty obvious to me that we are being robbed blind by the big banks and Wall Street investment houses. Come on people, wake the hell up!” I sighed again.

Jesus chuckled, “Ted, Ted, Ted… This is news to you? That most people are asleep and don’t want to wake up? Man, what are you thinking? Of course 99% of the people aren’t going to listen. You read The Revelation of Saint John when you were sixteen! You know how this plays out. Sheesh.”

“Yeah, I know. When I am hanging out with you, or one of my few other informed friends, it’s much better, but when I am out amongst the masses, or even sitting alone it’s tough.”

The Lord shook his head, “Look man, we’re all alone. No matter what we do, no matter how close we get to someone else, we are still apart from other people. You experience the world from inside you skull.” The Lord knocked on my head. “Your eyes peer out from ‘in there,’ giving you a feeling of separateness from The Universe.”

“Consciousness is a bitch, Jesus.”

The Son of Man let out a hearty laugh. “Well said, Theodore. Well said.”

“So, that whole ‘soul mate’ thing is a crock?” I askith He.

“Oh yeah, that one is total crock Teddily!” Jesus laughed even more.

“Well, that’s a relief.” I said. “I always thought that was pretty stupid. I mean, if you can find someone you are more or less compatible with, that is pretty good.”

“Allow me to expound upon your thesis. Do you have a piece of paper and a pen or a pencil in here?” Jesus started going through my glove compartment, the side pocket on his door. Then he went reaching under the seat. “You need to vacuum this thing out!” He exclaimed, as he came up with a golf pencil and an ATM deposit envelope from Sky Bank.

The Lord drew a triangle on the white space on the envelope. “Now, imagine this is the world you live in…”

“You mean the world is a triangle?” I askith, in a smart ass way.

“No and stop being cute, Ted. This is important stuff.” The Lord was getting all serious on me. “Okay, this is your world, and this is you.” Jesus drew a small circle inside the triangle.

“That looks like the top of the pyramid on the back of a dollar bill.” I said as I cocked my head to see the drawing. "You are not going to try to get me to become a Mason, are you?"

“Ugh” said The Lord. “That’s not the point.” Jesus began filling in the rest of the triangle with the same size circle. “All of these other circles represent other people” as he circled away. Then He held it up for me to see it better. “What do you see?”

“I see a bunch of circles inside a triangle?” was the best answer I had. “Keep in mind I am trying to drive here.”

“Exactly!” Exclaimed The Son of Man. “How close can one circle get to another?”

“Close enough to touch…” then a light went off in my head. “But they can never fully touch! They only touch each other slightly.”

“Right-O, Theo. No matter what, there is always some space between them. Between you and anyone else.” The King of Kings was excited I got it. “I should have been a teacher.”

“You kinda were and are.” realizing after I said it, that HE was being sarcastic.

The Lord’s simple explanation, using geometric shapes, made a lot of sense.

“Hey, what about when a man sticks his round tube into a woman’s round hole? Ha!” I was being half smart-ass, half intellectual. Okay, mostly smart-ass. “Doesn’t that disprove your explanation? Isn’t that the closeness we are missing?”

“Well, first, I never did that…” The Lord started.

I interrupted, “Wait, you never has sex? I know that’s what the church teaches, but I figured it was their way to make sex bad, and control people.”

“No, Ted. I never performed that act. I had enough problems without having a bunch of crazed or angry women chasing after me. Messiah groupies are the worst.” Jesus shook his head. “Regardless of my lack of human experience, the feeling is temporary. While you may feel connected on a deep level in the moment, the feeling can quickly fade, and usually does. Then it can be replaced by, jealousy, boredom, possessiveness, anger and hate.”

“Yes, Lord, you are right. It is very hard to recapture those first moments of being one with someone. The world is full of ex-soul mates who want each other dead. Does that mean sex is, in fact, bad?”

“No, it is not bad, or immoral. It just that people put too much into it. They try to attach deeper meaning to something transient. In that way, it is much like the rest of life. Everything is transient. Awareness of that is the key to understanding life, and managing your own mind. It is what it is and nothing more.”

“Isn’t that enough, Jesus? For life to be what it is, and nothing more?”

“If only everyone could understand that, my friend. If only……” The Son of Man’s voice trailed off and my best friend faded into nothingness.

Then, there I was again, a circle, alone in the triangle of The Universe.

copyright 2009 Ted Sky All rights reserved

Chapter Nine - A Very Strange Day With the "Reason for The Season," and Bob.

It was December 23 and time for me to get serious about Christmas shopping. Driving down Baldwin Road, I saw two men arguing in front of a Nativity display, at Saint Eugene’s church. “People” I thought to myself as I drove by. Then I got that, ‘You better go back and see what that is about feeling.’

“Damn. I hope this isn’t how I get shot,” went through my mind as I turned my truck around. It looked like the situation was getting out of hand, so I sped up and slid into the church parking lot. Getting quickly out of the truck, I stepped on a patch of ice, and fell flat on my ass. At least that caused the two men arguing to stop for a moment. From what I could tell, it seemed one of the men was with the church. The other was in a T-shirt, and wearing a trucker’s hat that said “Holy Roller” across the front. He was sleeved out with tattoos, all of which were depictions of Eastern Rite and early Christian religious images. That’s when I knew my friend, The Son of Man was causing trouble, again.

“Gentlemen, gentlemen, it’s Christmas! This is not the time for arguing” I said I walked towards them, wondering just what Jesus was up to.

Jesus spoke, “I was just trying to explain to Nimrod here, that SHE didn’t look like that!” as he pointed to the Virgin Mary.

“Hey buddy this is the way it has always been, and no burned out flower child is going to tell ME what the Virgin Mother looked like!” The man was poking his finger into The Lord’s chest.

Jesus had fire in his eyes as he shot back “Think! They were from the Middle East. She didn’t have porcelain skin, or blue eyes, and she certainly wasn’t dressed like Mother Teresa in her Sunday best! And I didn’t have blonde hair with a gold plate behind my head.”

The church man replied, “I ain’t going to be dressing up the nativity here with no sand-eatin son's of bitches!” At that point, The Son of Man grabbed the church man by the neck with his right hand and cocked his other arm. I was waiting to see just how hard Jesus could hit someone, and what the aftermath would be. I thought maybe his fist would go right the guy’s skull.

Then The Lord let go of the man, sadly said, “Aahhh, what’s the use?” then turned away and started walking towards my truck.

“Do you know that guy?” the church man asked.

“Yes” I said, “He is my brother.”

“Well, you better up his dosage then!” the man laughed, as I walked away. The temptation for me to smash the guy in the mouth was nearly overwhelming.

Jesus was still steaming when I got into the car. We drove away in silence.

After I few minutes, I asked The Lord, “Why did that upset you so much? I mean, they have been putting up those things for centuries by now.”

Jesus said,  “Brother Ted, they have gotten so much of what I said, and what happened twisted around, when I saw my mom looking like a ‘Barbie Doll in a Blue Nun’ costume, I just had to do something. It just gets to me sometimes, you know? December 25th isn’t even my birthday!”

“Yes, Jesus, I know. Christmas isn’t really about you, or about anything except and reason to buy gifts for people, many of whom you really don’t want to buy a gift for. It’s the season of obligatory cheer and faux love. That’s why I am out today. I usually can get in the spirit of the season. Lately, each year it is becoming harder and harder. The one part I do like is to give unexpected gifts. Why should gifts be expected anyway?”

After a few miles, I pulled into the snow-covered Home Depot parking lot. "Well, this is my first stop. I need to stop in and pick up some Christmas decorations. You coming along?" I askith HE.

Jesus saw we were at Home Depot. "You bet! My stepdad is a carpenter.” Jesus lit right up. “Maybe I can pick him something up!" Apparently The Son of Man liked the idea of unexpected gift giving too.

We entered the orange hell known as Home Depot, and I wandered around for a bit, pushing a cart with one bad wheel, and let Jesus wander around and enjoy being “The reason for the season.”

I heard a loud guffaw a few aisles over and found Jesus laughing so hard he was holing his stomach. Gasping, HE said, “Ted, Ted. We HAVE to buy this! “ It was an eight foot inflatable snow globe, with Santa Claus kneeling at a manger.

“You want me to buy this, after you nearly clobbered the guy over the church nativity a half hour ago?” The Lord does work in mysterious ways, I thought.

“Oh, oh, that was someone trying to protect an idea that he believed was sacred. This, this is true American art. Bad taste Americana, for sure. But it is a hoot!”

“Alright, help me toss it in the cart, and I will go find the outdoor extension cord, and timer for it.” I said while shaking my head.

The electrical cords were a few aisles away, on the other side of the store. After evaluating the different specs, I tossed two in the cart, along with an outdoor timer, and started working my way back towards the front of the store.

I head the sound of an air tool being used “pffft-thunk!” in the main tool aisle, and there I found Jesus trying out the various nail guns. He was shooting nails through his palms, hitting a piece of wood set up to try out the nail guns. There was a small crowd gathering. "Ted! Have you seen these things? They're great!" “Pffft-thunk!” as Jesus shot another nail through his hand.

"Oh noooo....this is bad," I thought to myself. The Son of Man, effectively mocking his own crucifixion with a nail gun.

"Dude! You are crazy," said the burned out pot-head nail-gun expert working the aisle.

"I'll take this one, and a roll of framing nails, and the compressor that can operate on 12VDC." The Lord was excited in a most disturbing way.

Knowing we had to get out of there, fast. I tossed the hardware into the cart and I hurried Jesus to the check out line. The clerk looked at Jesus with that, "I swear I have seen you somewhere else" look. The bill came to $749.67, for the nail-gun set-up, and another $200 for the Santa-manager snow globe. I looked at Jesus, and he padded his sides and shrugged his shoulders. Great, I have to by the Son of God some toys with my money, and a goofy snow globe that my neighbors are just going to love. "What are you going to do with all that stuff, anyway?” I askith HE.

"Me and the Angel of Death, a.k.a. Grim Reaper, have some pick-ups this today. I figured that the Angel of Death, would like the nail gun, instead of the usual scythe. It's a funny thing with people. They think they can spend their whole lives causing pain, misery and death to thousands, even millions of people, and then use their least breath asking to be forgiven" said HE. “Sometimes I like to be there, just to let them know they haven’t been successful in bullshitting their way through life. They may have bullshitted themselves, but not me.”

"Isn't that what we have been taught? It isn't acts, it is by grace alone?" I didn't understand.

"That load of manure was cooked up by churches so they could get people to cough up some wealth before they check out. Sorry, no dice." Jesus was unpacking the nail gun.

"Well, it is good to know that justice is meted out in the end, Jesus."

"Ted, do you remember the time your cousin told you that some of the people he saw as an EMT looked surprised at the moment of their death? Now you know why. It's another rule of the universe. People may not like it. They may see it as unfair, but it is the way it is."

"Where are you supposed to meet up with the Angel of Death? Is that what you call him, "Angel?"

“No, of course not! I just call him 'Bob."

"Now wait a minute. The Angel of Death, The Grim Reaper, is named Bob?" I could not believe that.

"Why not Bob? It's a good name." The Lord was amused.

"Alright, where are you supposed to meet Bob?" I asked.

"The Starbucks in Rochester.”

Of course, this made about as much sense as anything else that had happened today….

We got to the Starbucks, and there was 'Bob' who looked more like Neo from The Matrix, except for the fact he was about seven feet tall. "Bob, this is my friend Ted." I shook Bob's hand, it was not cold, but he had the deepest black eyes I had ever seen. We all got coffee Bob got the Cafe Latte, extra shot of espresso, light whip, and a caramel drizzle. The AOD sure was fancy with his coffee choices. He had no money either, of course. I picked up the tab for the coffee too. I mumbled, "You guys could bring a little cash with you...." under my breath.

We walked outside, and Bob looked at the sky and said, "This is a good day to die." Then he and Jesus laughed. Bob went and got his vehicle, a black Escalade with 22" chrome rims. I helped them put the nail gun and compressor in the 'Sclade." Do you want to come along?" asked Bob. "We normally don't take the Quick on these outings, but you seem like an okay guy."

"I am going to have to take a rain-check on that Bob, but thanks for the offer." Hanging out with the Son of Light and the Angel of Death, while fun and educational, would just be a little too odd, and probably a lot terrifying for me. Plus, I still had shopping to do.

Later that evening, I watched the news on T.V. to see if there were any deaths by nail gun during the day.......

Epilogue: Bob is a wicked shot with a nail gun. If you hear a “pffft-thunk” drop to the floor.

copyright 2009 Ted Sky All rights reserved