We put the canvas top down, and started south on Arizona Route 261. I must have fallen asleep, the next thing I remember was waking up to Route 66 signs flashing by. Yawning and stretching I said, "Hey, Joshua, haven't you found a place to have a few long necks yet?"
"Almost there, Theo!" The Lord sayith unto me.
After few more miles down the road, Jesus pulled off into the gravel parking lot of the Corpus Christi Hotel and Bar. "You have to see this place, Ted. It was someone's idea of a tourist attraction back in the day." Jesus was laughing and shaking his head.
We walked into the dimly lit bar, and took a few seconds for our eyes to adjust. There were the typical cow skulls hanging on the walls, intermixed with a collection of the tackiest Jesus-themed works of "art" I had ever seen. Behind the bar was a back-lit painting of Jesus being crucified, on blue glass, with a rainbow burst.
The Last Supper made out of a hunk of dried cheese hung near the kitchen entrance.
The Virgin and Child paint-by-numbers was on the door of the ladies rest room. That was actually hauntingly beautiful.
The more I looked, the weirder it got. Around the walls of the bar were fourteen small booths, one for each station of the cross. There was little plaque above each table, with a plaster cast representation of each station.
- Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane,
- Jesus is betrayed by Judas and arrested,
- Jesus is condemned by the Sanhedrin,
- Jesus is denied by Peter,
- Jesus is judged by Pilate,
- Jesus is scourged and crowned with thorns,
- Jesus takes up his cross,
- Jesus is helped by Simon to carry his cross,
- Jesus meets the women of Jerusalem,
- Jesus is crucified,
- Jesus promises his kingdom to the repentant thief,
- Jesus entrusts Mary and John to each other,
- Jesus dies on the cross,
- Jesus is laid in the tomb.
We walked up to the bar, with the Jesus Painted on Blue Glass's eyes following The Son of Man and I. Jesus ordered two Dos Equis Ambars from the one-eyed Mexican woman tending bar. She really wasn't one-eyed. She had two, but one was all milky white and creepy as hell. We took our beers, and I asked Jesus where he wanted to sit. "Let's sit at booth-station number 4. You know, Peter had no balls. Pretty disappointing, really. Some 'rock,' sheesh! Most of those guys were losers, never amounted to much. They were more like roadies than apostles."
We sat on opposite sides of the booth, enjoying our much deserved beers, neither of us talking. It didn't take long before we both downed our Dos Equis. "Joshua, ready for another?" I asked my friend.
Jesus let out a loud belch, and said, "I am now. Had to make some room there."
I waved my hand in front or my face and said, "What on Earth did you have to eat? That was a really nasty smell."
"Oh, sorry about that. It probably was the camel jerky." Jesus explained.
"Of course, camel jerky. Yep, that would do it." I said as I shook my head and walked over to the bar to get two more cold Dos Equis.
I got back to the table with two cold beers, and slid one over to Jesu. He looked at me and asked, "Hey Ted, where are we?"
Well, that depends on what you mean by where. We are, at this moment, at the Corpus Christi Hotel and Bar on Route 66 in Arizona. If that is your question.
"That's a good initial answer. But, where is that?" The Son of Man was looking for something more.
Ah, I see. This is going to be a deeper discussion. Well, we are at a point in space-time that by the time I finish this sentence we will no longer be at. We are forever moving through time and space. It only feels like we are stationary. Impermanence it the nature of life.
Now, this spot on the surface of the Earth is actually moving at 1675 km/h or 465 meters/second. That is roughly equal to leaping the length of one and one-third football fields every second. Our solar system moves at about 800 thousand kilometers an hour. In ninety seconds, we have journeyed 20,000 kilometers around the Milky Way galaxy. The Milky Way itself is moving at 600 kilometers per second through The Universe. It you add all those up, I have no idea where we are."
Jesus smiled and said, "You must have know there was going to be a quiz, Ted! That was a well reasoned answer of not knowing where you are."
"Thanks Jesus." I felt smart.
Jesus took another swig of his bear, and then asked, "But, where is The Universe, Ted?"
Now that is an interesting question. I would say that The Universe is everywhere, but that doesn't make sense, because everything has to me somewhere. It is somewhat of a logical puzzle, isn't it? It is akin to the story of William James meeting a woman who claimed that the Earth rested on the back of a turtle. When he asked what held up that turtle, she replied that it was a second turtle, of course. Professor James asked, "But would you be so good as to tell me what holds up the second turtle?" The woman replied, "It's no use, Professor. It's turtles-turtles-turtles, all the way!” So, I would have to concur that The Universe is rests on the back of a very large turtle! Ha ha ha ha!" I was very amused with myself.
Jesus just smiled, and said, "That is a good as an answer as any."
What God's only begotten Sun had asked me was something I pondered often. "Okay, I see where you are going with this. I have recently been reading that some scientists have come up with the theory that The Universe is a hologram. We are living in a 3D projection of a two dimensional space.
Additionally, there is evidence that The Universe is a simulation; that we may exist within a computer simulation. In fact, the odds are greater that The Universe is a simulation, than not. It appears that the structure of this simulation is a lattice. Which would jibe with the idea that we exist within a simulation. The lattice structure is the projection screen of the hologram."
Jesus threw me another complement, "That is some deep stuff Theodore. Are you also aware that The Universe is fractal?"
I took another drink of my beer, "I am aware of that, and it would back up the Holographic Universe theory. If you break a hologram into two pieces, you don't get two halves of a hologram, you get two complete holograms. If you break those in two, you will have four complete holograms. In a sense, it is turtles all the way down."
Jesus roared. "Yep, turtles, turtles, turtles! Do you know the story of Krishna as a child, and his mother, Yoshado?"
I think I know how it ends, but hearing you telling a story about Krishna, The Hindu Christ, would be sublime, J.C."
Jesus Christ, then told me a story about Khrishna.
"As a child, Krishna was very naughty. He was very fond of butter and would often steal milk and butter from other houses, and the women would come complaining to Yashoda about her son's mischievous activities.
One day, while playing in the fields, little Krishna secretly ate mud. His friends went and told Yashoda about this. When Krishna returned home, Yashoda caught Krishna by his ears and scolded him for putting dirt in his mouth. Krishna promptly replied that he had had a fight with his friends in the morning and to take revenge they were all lying and that Yashoda shouldn't believe them. He said that she was being unfair as she believed them instead of believing her son.
Yashoda knew her son too well. She ordered, "If you have not taken any mud, then open your mouth. I shall see for myself."
Krishna obediently opened his mouth. But when Yashoda peered into his mouth, she was wonderstruck. She saw the entire universe: the mountains the oceans, the planets, air, fire, moon and the stars in his small mouth. Yashoda was stunned and began to wonder whether she were dreaming or actually seeing something extraordinary. She fell on the ground, unconscious.
When she recovered, she realized what had happened. The Lord Almighty, in all his glory, was before her very eyes. It was little Krishna, the incarnation of Vishnu. Yashoda took the little boy on her lap and hugged him and cried with joy.
Now, Theodore, what does that mean within the context of a fractal, holographic, Universe?"
"A few years ago, I realized that now matter how close I can be to someone, I was alone. I am stuck in my head, peering out. All of us are. The Universe exists within our skulls. Nothing is 'out there. It is all, 'in here.'" I tapped my head with my index finger. "When Krishna opened his mouth, his mother saw that truth. The Universe lies within us. Each of us holds a hologram of The Universe in our skulls."
"Does that mean The Universe is an illusion, that none of this is real?" queried the I AM.
"On the contrary, that does not mean The Universe isn't real, even if it is a holographic simulation running inside a computer, and I intern exist within it. That computer and the program could be the mind of God. Whether or not reality is a computer simulation or something else, it doesn't matter. We are here, regardless."
Jesus pressed on, "If The Universe exists with your mind, how you can be sure that it exists in other people's as well? Are Solipsists correct that that only one's own mind is sure to exist?"
"It is my opinion that if The Universe is a fractal hologram, then it has to exist in everyone's mind. I think the philosophy of Solipsism is a crock of shit. It just serves to absolve one's responsibility to others. The reverse is true, because we hold The Universe in our minds, we are responsible for it. I am not saying that everything right or wrong in the world is our own doing, or that it can be changed just by thinking positively, but we are responsible for our free will and to take action to make a difference, to make The Universe better for all the souls who pass through it."
At that, Jesus stood up and said, "You are learning well, my friend, and I need another beer."
I followed Jesus up to the bar. He held up two fingers to the milky-eyed bar maid. She nodded, we collected two more beers, and made our way to the back patio. We both stood there, looking up at The Universe within all of us.
Copyright 2014, Ted Sky
