I heard the tires of the Bentley screeching as I as I was putting on my shoes. I grabbed my brown leather jacket and was out the door just as The King of Kings did another power slide and came to a stop at my curb.
I was shaking my head as I was getting in the Continental R coupe. "You certainly are one for dramatic entrances, Lord."
"I don't get to drive much, Theodore. When I do, I like to make the most out of it." Jesus was grinning.
"Where we off to this morning?" I quiried HE.
"The Blessed Sacrament Cathedral on Woodward." The Lord explained. "There is a confession coming in that I need to be there for."
You know, Jesus, I was raised Byzantine Catholic, and did the whole confession thing. The priest seemed bored with my sins, more often than not. But, I think it had a real, healing value.
"People have a burning need to tell their sins to someone. The Catholic Church provided that," explained HE. "There is a cathartic effect. But like everything else that carries power with it, it got corrupted by many. My favorite was buying certificates of absolution. That was the first paper money."
The LORD continued, "However, many of the confessions coming in regarding ending the great evil, have been confessions driven by fear, not by remorse or repentence. I suspect that is what is driving this "spiritual awaking" we are seeing."
We were blowing down I75 in the Bentley at 117 miles per hour, and the Son of Man was weaving in and out of traffic with the grace of a eagle in flight. I held on as we hit Exit 56B and the ramp onto Michigan Route 8 West. The tires we smoking, and I could smell rubber burning. "This is great!" I thought to myself.
We got off M8 at Oakland Ave/Woodward Ave and took a hard left onto M1 Woodward South. The Catherdral was just ahead on the left.
Jesus launched the Bentley into the parking lot next to Blessed Sacrement and we came to a rest.
"Hoo-wee Teddy-boy! That 'twas fun." Jesus said as he jumped out of the car. "Let's go."
We entered the Church from a back side entrance. There was a line of people qued up to confess. Business was good. Jesus sliped into a vacant confessional and began taking confessions. I sat in a pew near the confessional. The people there were the normal fair. Mostly old people who probably hadn't done anything wrong in ten years or more. Real sinners didn't have the courage to confess.
My cell phone vibrated in my pocket. I pulled it out, it was the I AM. "Jesus?" I asked as I answered the phone.
"Ted." The Lord whispered. "I thought you should hear this. For the historical record, you know."
I looked up, just as both confessionals opened up. A well-dressed man eye's darted nervously between them, and then he walked into the confessor's side of the one where Jesus had taken up residence.
I put the cell phone to my ear. "Forgive me Father for I have sinned...." "My last confession was over thirty years ago...."
The man went through the usual sins. Then he got to the point. "Father. I have been involved with child pornography for many years."
Then Jesus said, "What do you mean by involved? Please explain."
"Well. I, umm, have used it." the man stammered.
There was silence for what seemed like an eternity. I sensed Jesus was giving the man a chance to say more.
"That's it? You have used it?" I heard anger in The Lord's voice.
"That's all I have ever done. I swear Father." that was all the man was going to say.
"Well, my son, that is just not good enough!" Jesus shot back. "Isn't it true that you are a major player in the child pornography business? Isn't it true that you have engaged in sex with young children? Isn't it true that you have made trips to Bangkok, Thialand for the purpose of getting children for the sex-slave trade? Isn't it true you have murdered children after you have raped them?"
The man in the confessional began to ask, "Who are you? How..." as he tried to get out of there. I could see the handle shaking from where I was sitting.
"If you came here to confess your sins, then confess your sins!" the Lord bellowed.
"Who are you?!" the man screamed as he was furiously shoving against the door trying to escape his fate.
"Confess your sins Sir. Confess!" the Lord commanded. "This is pointless..."
A loud crash came out of the confessional as the man let out a terrifying scream. The few people in the cathedral ran towards the confessional door, just as it opened and the man fell out onto the floor, his eyes two smoking, bleeding holes in his skull, and an omega symbol burned into his forehead.
I peered into the confessional to see the screen smashed through from Jesus' side. The door to it opened, and Jesus stepped out wiping his fingers with a small handkerchief.
"Time to go, Theo" and the Lord and I walked down the main aisle, and exited the Blessed Sacrament Cathedral, like MacManus brothers from The Boondock Saints. The Lord tossed me a pair of Ray Bans as we jumped into the Bentley and headed north.
copyright 2010 Ted Sky all rights reserved
